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Fooled ya: an April Fool's wrap-up
As per tradition on April 1, news outlets around the world competed for ingenious and creative attempts at tricking their more gullible readers into believing outrageous stories.
From toilet-less trains to EU-sanctioned sand dunes, here is a round up of how the Danish newspapers attempted to deceive their readers.
Of the more creative attempts, Berlingske newspaper wrote that the EU was demanding that the sand dunes of Råbjerg Mile in Jutland immediately cease expansion. The sand dunes move about 15 metres every year and Berlingske wrote that according to an EU report, the dunes will have completely left its designated natural enclosure 150 years from now. The EU therefore threatened sanctions to stop the sandy migration, including losing the right to be called a scenic sand dune. The EU also designated funds to halt the migration and opened the possibility of sending north African workers up to help due to their experience in sand movement. EU regulations and imported African workers - needless to say, Pia Kjaersgaard was not impressed.
Ingeniøren newspaper wrote that a terrible financial situation and a lack of space for passengers have forced DSB to remove all toilets from their IC4 trains. The change would mean that travellers would be forced to hold their water for long distances, or wait until the trains stop at designated toilet stations, which would have 25 toilets on the platforms so that passengers can relieve themselves during three-minute stops.
BT newspaper claimed that former tennis 'legend' and current broke reality star Frederik Fetterlein has taken up residence on the Oslo ferry in an attempt to avoid paying taxes. BT wrote that the DFDS Seaways ferry would no longer sail to Oslo but rather remain in international waters so that Fetterlein can use it as his personal tax haven. The ship was to be remodelled to suit Fetterlein’s lavish and unsustainable lifestyle, including luxury apartments, casinos and a helicopter pad to fly in visitors.
Christiania Media released a press announcement saying that they had completely sold out to the capitalistic overlords. In an attempt to save the freetown, a sale put Disney as a majority stockholder and the company was poised to change Christiania into an amusement park called 'Hippie Dream World'.
MetroXpress newspaper got in on the act by writing that Danish stamps with Queen Margrethe would be replaced with special EU stamps. Jyske Vestkysten newspaper indicated that in attempt to neutralise social cliques in schools, uniforms will soon be mandatory in all Esbjerg schools. Other noteworthy jokes included Politiken newspaper saying that a new smartphone application would allow you to eavesdrop on nearby phone conversations. With this one, Pia Kjaersgaard was very impressed and likely immediately went to the app store so she could start listening in on all those evil immigrants.
And finally, your very own Copenhagen Post managed to get in not one but two April Fool's stories (yes, it was a slow news week) and sadly, the booze tax story was not among them. And although it shared a page with our April Fool's stories, the utterly unbelievable Danske Spil snafu was, sadly, real.
If you hadn’t registered the cheeky clandestine attempts that were slipped in the last edition, here they are.
In keeping with the rich tradition of highlighting Copenhagen as a utopia, we decided to feed the hungry trolls … er, we mean readers, by declaring the the city had been declared the best at being a best city. While it was immediately called out as a gag, we did receive some admirable responses, although most were about the scantly-clad young lady in the photo.
The second story was perhaps a little less graphic (no scantly clad ladies here) but while dihydrogen monoxide may sound like a poisonous chemical, it is in fact the chemical makeup of water. Still, Denmark has taxed sugar and fat and is now looking at beer, so it may be a prophecy yet to be fulfilled. Don’t feel ashamed if you fell for the gags, a radio station in the US actually included our water story as news. Sarah Palin was not impressed.
The best response from our readers in the comments section, typo and all, was by Thorvaldsen: “and Copenhagen Post has been hearlded as the world's best newspaper!”
Touché, good sir, touché.