Valentines Day for the gentleman

Pleasing the more primitive sex is simple and affordable

A month ago, men were scrambling around florists, petrol stations and clothing stores in a last minute rush to avoid the wrath their ladies would inevitably unload on them should they  foolishly underestimate Valentines Day.

But this Friday March 14, exactly a month after Valentine's Day, men get their own day. So ladies, forget the flowers, cute little cards and other sweet little gestures, because it’s all about the meat. The meat from the shop and the meat in his trousers. That’s right: it’s Steak and Blow Job Day!

The concept is simple. Prepare the man a steak in the manner he so prefers and perform fellatio on your said man in the manner he so prefers, and not necessarily in any order.

READ MORE: The love bench: bringing lovers together on Valentine´s

A Boston genius
The alternative/legendary holiday was founded in 2002 by a Boston radio host, Tom Birdey, who came up with the idea as a counterweight to Valentine's Day, which he contended was female-focused. It’s also big business.

In America alone, over 15 billion US dollars were spent on Valentine's Day gifts, and although a good steak may be difficult to find for a reasonable price in Denmark, the other component of Steak and Blow Job Day is, well, free.

Offering hints and tips on how to prepare and handle the various types of meat, the official Steak and BJ website is a beacon of inspiration.

Invaluable advice
According to Ekstrabladet tabloid, one thing that the man can do to make it a more favourable experience for his lady is to eat parsley, mint, lemon and celery 12 to 24 hours before the 'meat' is served to improve the 'taste' of the experience.

Asparagus, onion, cabbage, alcohol, nicotine and caffeine are among the things to avoid. Remember, the day returns next year.