The scavenger gourmet is coming to Scandinavia
I remember Jamie Oliver and Nigella Lawson on Nordic TV a while back – not together but shortly after one another, smugly plugging away.
They were at their worst when the presenters spoke their native language. It’s a look the British have spent centuries perfecting as if they’re saying: “Good grief, that’s not a language – it’s a linguistic car crash. I pity you.”
So normally I’d tune into such a show anticipating cringe-worthy comedy, but in the case of master scavenger Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall, I fear he’s going to take to the Scandinavian wilderness a little too adeptly – the only value will be watching the Danes fawn over DR2’s most popular chef.
Hugh’s Scandinavian Adventure starts off in Sweden so you’ll have to wait until next week for his visit to Denmark where he’ll hang out with Noma chef René Redzepi, architect Bjarke Ingels and an actor from The Killing; and cycle like he means it, climb a wind turbine on Samsø and take a swim in the city centre harbour.
What, no zoo barbecues or salvaging pork from the Danish military? It’s an itinerary worthy of Joseph Goebbels.
SVT1, Mon 16:35 The Paradise
Who knows (or cares) which first came out of ITV’s Mr Selfridge and the BBC’s The Paradise, which was recently scrapped after just two series despite a loyal following who claimed the show had an authenticity and quality the American upstart could only dream of. But yet Mr Selfridge persevered because Jeremy Piven was well liked in Entourage and people have no taste.
Bad taste can always be arranged. Try Scientologists at War (DR3, Mon 21:00) in which a former enforcer turned whistleblower reveals all about their shady dealings and how he recruited Tom Cruise.
Relax Tom, A Long Weekend with the Son of God (DR2, Sat 17:50) is not about you but some whack-job in Siberia. Just reading the premise will make you trip out.
Elsewhere, Siege in Sahara (DR2, Thu 23:00) recounts the 2013 terrorist attack on a gas plant in Algeria that left 40 dead; A Good Man in Rwanda (BBC World, Sat 22:10 or Sun 16:10) is a heart-wrenching look at humanity at its worst; BBC Entertainment has got new series of Dragon’s Den (Mon 21:10), Fresh Meat (Mon 22:10) and Pointless (Mon 17:45); and there’s the second season of US thriller series The Blacklist (TV3, Mon 21:00).
Game of Thrones – season four
Imagine the Ewings getting wiped out. Because that’s what happened in Game of Thrones (returning in the US this Sunday). And always in episode nine. Watch your back in that one, John Snow!
The one thing us viewers fear more than the White Walkers is a drop in quality. Like injecting too much magic into the proceedings – like there is in the books.
Yes, no family is safe. As Danish actor Nikolaj Coster-Waldau (Kingslayer) told us last year, the Lannisters are the Manchester United of the series…
Sport of the Week:
SVT1, Thu 22:50 US Masters (Photo:Scanpix)
Augusta in April … has there ever been a better sporting alliteration? In the absence of Tiger Woods, they’ll be swinging around the doglegs in search of birdies at the Masters.
3+, Tue & Wed 19:30 Champions League quarter-final second legs (Photo:Scanpix)
Elsewhere, the Champions League reaches the crucial quarter-final second leg stage and the Formula One season moves on to Bahrain.
3+, Sun 15:30 Formula One: Bahrain Grand Prix (Photo:Scanpix)
Film of the Week:
SVT1, Sat 22:15 Remember Me
In the compelling War Witch (DRK, Tue 23:00 War Witch) an African 14-year-old girl soldier relates her life story to her unborn child. With more obvious witchcraft fare, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part One (K5, Sat 21:00) is the best in the series. And finally, Remember Me and Two Lovers (DR3, Mon 22:15 Two Lovers) are two intelligent dramas that come highly recommended.